Free Referee Training

What Religion is your Bra?

A man walked into the ladies department of Myer's and shyly walked up to

the woman behind the counter and said, 'I'd like to buy a bra for my wife. '

' What type of bra?' asked the clerk.

'Type?' inquires the man, 'There's more than one type?'

' Look around,' said the saleslady, as she showed a sea of bras

in every shape, size, colour and material imaginable.

'Actually, even with all of this variety, there are really only four types of bras to choose from .'

Relieved, the man asked about the types.

The saleslady replied: 'There are the Catholic, the Salvation Army, the Presbyterian, and the Baptist types.

Which one would you prefer?'

Now totally befuddled, the man asked about the differences between them.

The Saleslady responded, 'It is all really quite simple.

The Catholic type supports the masses;

The Salvation Army type lifts the fallen;

The Presbyterian type keeps them staunch and upright;

The Baptist type makes mountains out of molehills.'

Have you ever wondered why A, B, C, D, DD, E, F, G, and H are the letters used

to define bra sizes?

If you have wondered why, but couldn't figure out what the letters stood for,

it is about time you became informed!

(A} Almost Boobs.
{B} Barely there...
{C} Can't Complain!..
{D} Dang!...
{DD} Double dang!...
{E} Enormous!...
{F} Fake...
{G} Get a Reduction...
{H} Help me, I've fallen and I can't get up!...

They forgot the German bra.

Holtzemfromfloppen

Humor for the day!

Suzie's New Recipe Collection : Food Glorious Food

This is from my friend Judy Gaskin

Roasted Cauliflower - Seves 6.

Preheat oven to 400 degrees
Lightly spray a large baking dish (9x13) with vegetable oil. Pan must be broiler safe and large enough to spread cauliflower to a single layer.

Cut one medium head cauliflower into small even pieces. A really giant head of cauliflower might require a bigger pan and more dressing and topping.

Topping: Mix together in a small bowl and set aside
1/3 cup small bread crumbs(4 slices of bread dried and mashed with a rolling pin) and 1/3 cup grated Parmesan cheese

Cauliflower: Place the following in a reclosable gallon bag and shake to evenly coat
2 Tablespoons minced garlic
1 teaspoon dried parsley (1 T fresh)
3 Tablespoons olive oil
salt and pepper to taste
cauliflower

Pour into large pan and spread to a single layer. Cover tightly with foil.

Bake 10-15 minutes and stir. Bake 10 minutes more or until just tender..

Set oven to low broil.

Remove foil cover. Sprinkle bread crumb topping evenly over cauliflower. Broil for 3-5 minutes until topping has little brown specks.

Enjoy. Makes good leftovers.

Transcending: Words on Women and Strength by Kelly Corrigan

My cousin sent this to me today.....I loved it. Hope you enjoy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_4qwVLqt9Q

What happens to the greedy!

I am so proud..she is so proud!

My daughter Lindsay is a coupon queen like me. She loves a good deal and finds all kinds of them. A girl after my own heart.
Her husband is a law student and she is the temporary breadwinner. So on her meager budget, she is making great strides. She sent me this email tonight, I just had to post it. I thought it might inspire someone who was thinking about "couponing"
It definitely takes time..but oh so worth it. She has even inspired me to get back on the bandwagon for groceries I do a little but give most of my grocery coupons to my daughter-in-law. Now restaurant coupons I hord all to myself. Greg and I use them several times a week.

Lindsay says" take a look at my loot. I got all of this for $15.48!! I had a coupon for every single thing except the mac and cheese (but they were on sale.) There were a few things that they were out of that I have to go back tomorrow to get. but really, you could only use 20 coupons at once... and I did, so i guess i would have to go back anyway."


Way to go LINDSO. You were paying attention all those years I drug you to the store with my coupon caddy.

Smarty Pants Kid

This is cute. What a fun way to teach your kid.....if they are brilliant, of, course.

Quit the Church?

Quit the Church

In a local newspaper in Provo, Utah, there had been an ongoing series of
articles written by individuals who wanted to persuade LDS Church members
to leave the Church. In response to the highly critical and spirited
remarks, a local member wrote this rebuttal:

Editor:
I have been thinking of quitting the Mormon Church. Yes, if I can, I am
going to get even with that church. As soon as I can find another church
that teaches about the Gathering of the House of Israel; the return of
the Ten Tribes and their mission; the return of the Jews to Palestine
and why, and how they are going to build the temple; the building of
temples and what to do with them; the mission of Elias, the prophet,
as predicted by Malachi; the method for the salvation of the people that
died at the time of Noah in the flood; the origin of the American Indian;
the complete explanation of why Jesus of Nazareth had to have a mortal
mother but not a mortal father; the explanation of the three degrees of
glory
(three heavens) as mentioned by Paul; the complete explanation of why
Elias and Moses did not die but had to be translated (since they both
lived before the resurrection was introduced by Christ); the restoration
of the gospel by modern revelation as promised by Peter and Paul and
Jesus himself; the belief in eternal marriage and the family, and the
knowledge and the place to seal for eternity; that teaches abstinence
from all harmful drugs and foods ; and that sells the best fire
insurance policy on earth, for the last days, for only a 10th of
my income.

Yes sir, as soon as I can find another church that teaches all that,
or even half as much, I will say good-bye to this Mormon Church. The
church that I am looking for must also be able to motivate 50,000+ youth,
and adults, for the first, second or third time, to leave their homes for
two years at their own expense and go to far-away places to teach and
preach without salary. It must be able to call, on a frosty day, some 5
or 6 thousand professors, students, lawyers, doctors, judges,
policemen, businessmen, housewives and children to go and pick apples at
6 a.m. It must be able to call meetings and get the attention for two
hours of more than 150,000 men. Yes, it must also teach and show why
salvation is assured for children who die before eight years of age.

Mr. Editor, could you help me find a church that teaches all that and
more than hundreds of other doctrines and principles, which I have no
room to mention here, and which brings solace and comfort to the soul;
peace, hope, and salvation to mankind, and above all, that answers the
key questions that all the great philosophers have asked; questions and
answers that explain the meaning of life, the purpose of death,
suffering and pain; the absolute need for a Redeemer and the marvelous
plan conceived and executed by Jesus Christ the Savior? Yes, as soon as
I find another church that teaches that, and also that has the
organization and the powers to make that teaching effective, I am going
to quit the Mormon Church. For I should not tolerate that "they" should
change a few words in the Book of Mormon-even if those changes simply
improve the grammar and the syntax of the verses-for, after all, don't
you think the Divine Church should employ angels as bookmakers, and
clerks, to do all the chores on earth? Don't you think, Mr. Editor,
that the Divine Church should also have prophets that don't get sick and
don't get old and die, and certainly, that don't make a goof here and
there. No, sir! A Divine Church should be so divine that only perfect
people should belong to it, and only perfect people should run it. As a
matter of fact, the Church should be so perfect that it should not even
be here on earth!

So, I repeat, if any one of the kind readers of this imperfect letter
knows about another church that teaches and does as much for mankind as
the Mormon Church, please let me know. And please do it soon, because
my turn to go to the cannery is coming up. Also, "they" want my last
son (the fifth one) to go away for two years and again, I have to pay for
all that. And I also know that they expect me to go to the farm to
prune trees, and I have heard that our ward is going to be divided again,
and it is our side that must build the new chapel. And also, someone the
other day had the gall of suggesting that my wife and I get ready to go
on a second mission, and when you come back, they said, you can volunteer
as a temple worker.

Boy, these Mormons don't leave you alone for a minute. And what do I
get for all that, I asked? "Well," they said, "for one, you can look
forward to a funeral service at no charge!"... Do you think you can
help me to find another church?
Thomas D. Clark

Suzie's New Recipe Collection : Food Glorious Food

This is from my good friend Karen Walker in Birmingham, Alabama. She said it has become her husband's favorite.

Coconut Pecan Cake

1 yellow cake mix
4 eggs
1 cup water
3/4 cup vegetable oil
1 container coconut pecan frosting


Preheat oven to 350.  Grease and flour bundt pan.
Combine the 5 above ingredients (yes, even the container of frosting). I add some extra chopped pecans.  Pour mixture in prepared pan.  Bake at 350 for 45 mins. (or till done).  Remove from oven and allow to cool for about 15 mins. before removing from pan.

This cake is extra moist and extra rich.